Wheatfield: circa 1996

The romantic notion Time heals all wounds gaping and otherwise. Instead remember the past idyllic.

Lessons on learning about everyone’s (different) definition of polyamorous relationships — Last weekend I had a fun and exciting night out with my poly partner of three months. We went to a sex club and had playtime all over that joint. …

How I use my hair as part of my sexual identity — He handed me the folded note. As I glanced down, I saw that it was actually the ripped-off top of his Camel cigarette box. The note read, “If your soul is as beautiful as your hair, then you are one lucky girl.” …

Bust out that camera and get ready to pose for a sexy photoshoot before you get it on — I zoomed in with the camera and angled it to get just the right amount of the cuffs, the collar, and his beard. It helped that he was also pouting his lips, so I added those in during the second photo for good measure. Point. Shoot. It was easy. As…

Ever come home from a great date and found yourself feeling sad? — We had just said our goodbyes after a night of eating good food, having a great conversation, and some late-night debauchery. As I drove home, I found myself still high on a wave of dopamine-fueled good feelings thinking of everything that had transpired over the course of the evening. As…

The poly/monogamous divide feels wider than ever in our marriage. — One of the greatest gifts you can give to yourself is to finally (and unapologetically) figure out who you are. Sure, maybe it takes six years of being in a relationship, and then four more years of marriage to someone to come to the realization. …

Don’t worry — you won’t be getting handcuffed in these locales unless you want to. — If you’re cheap like me, you probably don’t want to squander your hard-earned money on a hundred-plus-dollar hotel room that you are utilizing for only a couple of hours while you bang your partner. …

Getting married and having kids doesn’t mean you have to give up your personal identity — I recently read several articles on Medium where women writers were speculating about two things: the life they “could have had” in their 20s and 30s if they hadn’t been child-rearing and married and the loss of identity once their children were out of the house. As I read these…